I like to steal
I like to steal a lot
I run on little happenings. My days are marked by small pieces, little words, and they dictate how I feel. My mind is easily distracted and partial to what other people think or say.
Have you ever felt like this?
How is it that one sentence can change your whole day?
I have this book that guides me in every decision of my life. This book is old, wise, and living. Some of the ideas in this book are really hard. They are hard to believe, trust, or obey. In this book there is an idea. The idea is how we can capture every thought.
What does that mean?
How can you do that?
I have a lot of thoughts in one day…
Yesterday was a tough day for me. I woke up feeling like a failure. I have been expecting people to treat me in certain ways. I didn’t get anything I desired, and I had a rough day. I sat (not literally) waiting for texts, phone calls, and emails. And they never came. My phone has this little green light that lets me know when I have a message. This little green light can make or break my day. This little green light causes stress, anxiety, and joy. All the while it is still only a little green light. I tried to take a nap believing I would wake up in a better mood. I was wrong. I was only able to close my eyes for ten minutes at a time. I was waiting for my little green light to blink. Nothing I was waiting on was life or death. The whole day seemed to be like this. And after all day realizing how petty I was being, I stopped.
I captured a moment.
I was in club and I saw beauty. I saw leaders hanging out with high schoolers, singing, laughing, and sharing life. I was in awe that I get to be a part of something God is doing. I couldn’t imagine any place else I would rather be.
When I put my mind in order I realize there are far greater amounts of joy in a day than bad moments. I have large quantities of beauty, laughter, food, love, and great people in my life. The bad moments are few and far in between. My life is really good. I laugh a lot, I smile more, and I have a lot of people who love me.
What would my attitude be if I dwelt on all the good moments in a day? What would my life look like if I counted my blessings and stopped dwelling on the pain? I do not understand how to dwell on the good. It is not taught, nor is it easy to do. We know how to dwell on the hard, painful, stupid parts of life.
Currently I am writing this on my lap and my legs are fully asleep and I am smiling because it is a fun, weird, but a cool feeling. I seriously can’t move my toes right now. It probably isn’t good, but I am smiling. I want to enjoy this small part of my day. My legs might not fall asleep for a long time after today.
Capturing every thought seems impossible, and probably is. But I also think it means dwelling rightly. How can we take what happens daily and dwell on the great parts and stop dwelling on the bad? Sounds optimistic, but I want to try.
I like to steal
Ideas, laughs, hearts, glances, and I am sorry I’m not sorry!