Sometimes I think I don’t like coffee so much as I like the sugar in it.
I have been growing in confidence. I have learned a lot about confidence. How there is a big difference between confidence and cockiness. How people look different with and without confidence, and the feeling of humility throughout it all. Read Leadership Freak on confidence!
When I like something I usually kill it. In high school I loved this restaurant called Kyoto. They sold a sesame chicken rice bowl, soda, and free chops sticks for five bucks. The sauce they put on the chicken could make you rob a bank. Just writing this makes my mouth water. #Pavlovdogproblems. My best friend and I would go thrice times a week. There were two problems with Kyoto. You always left smelling like the inside of a burnt oven, and we killed it. We over ate the sesame chicken. We loved it too much. I can’t eat there anymore. Maybe I am the only one, but that’s what I do. It’s why my starbucks knows my drink….
I have a mustache on my face, and it has almost served its purpose. I have it on my face as a reminder. A reminder to remember to be me. Be who Jesus made me to be. Not someone else. Or not who I believe other people think I am supposed to be.
I used to be extremely cocky, and not confident.
I was at dinner the other night with some friends and noticed something strange. There was a girl with us who was crying out for attention. She was saying stuff you could tell she didn’t want to say. She lacked confidence, but the only reason why I could see it was because I was once the same.
I can’t begin to tell you how much I love how this life is not about us. I don’t really matter, and that makes everything significant. When you start living in this knowledge you start to see people differently. You start to see yourself differently. You realize people are starving for food that will fill them forever. We are all thirsty for water that will quench us for the rest of time.
With this new knowledge of confidence came an understanding of myself and others. I had to understand what I like. What do I like? What gives me life? When you can understand yourself, you start to understand others, and you can bring life to those who are without.
But just like Kyoto, we can kill things.
We kill Jesus as Americans. We do the same thing over and over and over again hoping to grow…. Jesus was the most consistent at being inconsistent. You could only trust that you will never know what He was up to. There was and is a beautiful mystery. Just a knowledge of His control will decrease anxiety, lessen stress, and cast away your burdens. If you trust.
My confidence has been crushed under the foot of humility and grace. I had to pick myself up and realize the only confidence I can have is in Jesus. He knows what He is doing. I can be me, I can like what I like, and I can show others Life through it all.
Stop killing yourself, and start living. Let us be people who are confident in ourselves because of who made us unique. He made you to love what you love, so love Him who has done it.
So what if I like sugar with a little coffee, lets get a drink together!